Advice, Cards and Success
by LDNatalie
Summary: 3 mini stories, Howince. Based on Oscar Wilde quotes.


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**I decided to write something for a challenge, and I came up with this, alongside a longer fic which I will post later. I really hope you like it. please review! xxx**

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**_The only thing to do with good advice is pass it on. It is never any use to oneself._**

'Naboo' Vince began hesitantly. He had been mulling this over for a while now, and wasn't sure if it was the right decision, but something had to be said.

'You know how the other day you came back from that shamen team bonding weekend...' he trailed off, nodding earnestly at a bemused Naboo.

'Yeah' said Naboo lazily, glancing out the window and noting the sun was setting.

'Well you were saying stuff' Vince said, going a bit red, 'about someone and I wondered if you wanted to talk about it with anyone?'

Naboo frowned, 'what goes on team bonding stays on team bonding' he said firmly, his memories stirring and making him start to panic.

'I know what you mean' said Vince, a little wistfully, 'but you were in here, Bollo was trying to find that hangover potion thing, which _by the way _you said you didn't have the other night, and you were going on about someone. Someone you said you liked but didn't notice you'.

It suddenly came roaring back to Naboo and he stood up quickly, 'I was joking' he said hurriedly. Vince tugged his sleeve and made him sat down. 'Now, now, don't get your turban in a twist, tell me about it'

Naboo sat down and sighed. 'He never notices me' he said quietly, 'all he ever does is fight with Tony bloody Harrison'.

Vince nodded, feeling a bit like Trisha and crossed his ankles gracefully, 'and how does that make you feel?' he said, tilting his head.

Naboo rolled his eyes, 'how do you think Vince?'

Vince nodded and rubbed his nose. 'So why don't you tell him?'

Naboo frowned again, 'nah, we're mates aren't we, don't want to ruin it'

Vince nodded, 'but you have the chance for something don't you' he said softly, for something so much better. If you've found the person, you are so lucky to have, so don't you owe it to yourself?'

Naboo kicked the side of the sofa and made a noise of agreement.

'Because if you don't, it's a waste really, and you don't lose anything by putting yourself out there, just being honest'. Vince paused and moved to close the curtains.

'I think he likes you anyway' Vince said, turning and grinning, 'just get him alone, work some Shamanistic voodoo magic on him'

Naboo smiled a small smile which encouraged Vince. 'Look Naboo' he said, 'I know its scary, scary and embarrassing and so risky. But I think its worth it, because if he feels the same way…well that's just it isn't it? That's everything'. Vince stopped and looked taken-aback at his whole speech.

Naboo, seeming distracted moved towards the stairs, 'Thanks Vince. I should tell him how I feel' he said softly, turning and looking at his friend's confused face.

Vince nodded.

'You too' Naboo said suddenly. 'You too Vince'.

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**_One should always play fairly when one has the winning cards._**

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The Kiss On The Roof had become forever italicised in Vince's mind. It seemed to possess an almost mythic quality, to the extent where he sometimes wondered if he had dreamed it.

But since then, something had changed in Howard. His shoulders had straightened, his face broke out into smiles more often and he carried himself differently. He hummed as he moved about the shop, being flirted with by women who wandered into the shop. This had been happening for a good month now; and Vince was sick of it.

These women sauntered up the counter, patting their hair and adjusting their blouses and blinked up at his Howard, asking laden questions about hole punchers with wide-eyed innocence.

Howard had blushed the first time, but by now was used to it and had filled a little beige book full of women's cards. It was almost a standard daily routine, apart from the slight sideways look he used to give Vince as they handed over their cards; but he had stopped doing that now.

Vince was now sidelined, the women seeing something in Howard only he had noticed before. One woman casually inquired if he was previously in the armed services, sending Howard into a giddy monologue about his military roots. Vince knew that the extent of this was that his Dad once went into a tent, before declaring it too showy and lexiting, but he didn't ruin the tale.

Another had the audacity to twirl one of Howard's curls, tilting her head beguilingly and causing her lip-gloss to hit the light. 'Natural?' she had asked. 'You must have eaten your crusts' she said, dropping her card onto the table seductively.

Vince was so tired of the whole display that he picked up his magazine as another walked in. Howard letout a small tut that Vince only just heard. He was as bemused as everyone else, as to why he was suddenly flavour of the month. This didn't mean he didn't appreciate the confidence boost, but still, it was odd. Unwanted.

All the women were sort of plastic, and fake. They looked like if they laughed they would break in half, and they had this slightly glazed look in their eyes. Not like….he stopped thinking.

He had collected the little cards, not just as a little ego-boost but because he couldn't bear to through away the gesture, it was too sad to see a card in the bin, like a lamented Valentine.

The woman sauntered up the counter, snapping her chewing gum and racking her gaze up and down Howard's body. Vince frowned and tilted his head.

'Can I help' he said very slowly, moving in front of the till.

'Maybe' she said, gesturing him over the other side of the shop. Vince rolled his eyes but followed.

'Is he the one then?' she asked greedily, looking at Howard who was oblivious and correcrting out the grammatical errors in Cheekbone.

'What?' Vince asked, annoyed.

'I heard he's the one who's amazing in bed'.

Vince nearly fell over, but managed to steady himself.

'What? Howard?' he asked, lowering his voice further.

'Yes' she said, getting frustrated, 'you have to book in advance to date him, but he's some kind of Sex God'

Vince blinked twice, shook his head and slowly nodded.

'Where did you hear this?'

The woman smirked, 'want to keep all the action for yourself?'

Vince coughed, 'Where' he said assertively.

'This magician bloke and his hairy mate' she confided. 'Said to just give that gorgeous hunk o' man over there some coin and he'll give you booty' she said, winking at him.

She strolled back to the counter, gave Howard her card which Howard took with a polite smile and a thank-you.

Vince felt his stomach sink. Howard was _keeping_ all of those cards, tucking them into his…Vince paused…his book of booty. What if he took one of them up?

Feeling dizzy Vince sat down on the chair. Howard looked over, concerned.

'You okay there Little Man?' he asked, putting his book down and moving closer.

Vince looked over Howard's shoulder to see Naboo and Bollo enter the shop, pulling a face he nodded to Howard and stood up.

'What are you two playing at?' he asked Naboo and Bollo, following them upstairs.

'What' they said, swaying slightly.

'God, its 9:30am' Vince said, 'Cool it a bit yeah?'

Naboo rolled his eyes, 'We wondered how much more it would take for you to realise whats in front of you'

Vince went pink.

Bollo nodded. 'So Howard get action, you get jealous'

Naboo interrupted, 'So we started a rumour'

Bollo collapsed laughing, wheezing out 'Love Machine Moon'

Vince felt the urge to kick him. 'Shut it' he said, 'just stop saying it'

Vince went to his room, then went back downstairs - his heart racing.

Howard looked up, 'Better?' he asked kindly.

Vince nodded and breathed out. 'Here' he said, handing Howard something.

Howard looked down and saw a little square of pink cardboard with 'Vince' written on it. Next to it was their phone number.

'What is it?' asked Howard.

'Its my card' said Vince meaningfully. 'I wondered if you would consider _me_'.

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**_Anybody can sympathise with the sufferings of a friend, but it requires a very fine nature to sympathise with a friend's success._**

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Vince looked awful lately.

Howard felt mean for even thinking it, but he showed on Vince, possibly more than other people. He had dark circles his little tube of concealer couldn't hide; he was skinnier then before and yawned constantly. Howard sat at the till and counted the minutes till the lonely shift was over.

The current Cheekbone trend was to be bohemian and artistic and this required a muse and thus Vince's so-called friends had all leapt on the opportunity to use him. If he wasn't trying on a new collection he was posing for a portrait or being interviewed. His phone rang constantly, a sound Howard had grown to hate for the tinny metallic sound and for the sigh it drew from Vince as he picked it up. The whole affair sounded glamorous but hollow to Howard, who knew Vince didn't like saying no to his friends, who were flighty and unkind at the best of times.

It all made Howard want to hold him tight and look after him. Make him sit still for a bit and eat something, watch TV with him with Vince's feet resting gently on his. Make sure he got enough sleep; make sure he was warm enough. But he couldn't do any of this because Vince wasn't around so he just suffered through reoccuring nightmares where Vince collapsed from exhaustion over and over, silently screaming.

Howard woke up that night on the sofa, TV still on, and heard a quiet tapping at the door; glancing to his right he saw it was 3:15am. Howard opened the lock to see Vince there, shivering and biting his lip.

Vince stepped in, wincing as he took of his coat.

'Vince' began Howard hesitantly. Not knowing what to say. The moonlight made Vince seem even more delicate.

Vince looked up, avoiding Howard's eyes. 'Sorry, forgot keys'.

Howard nodded, 'That's okay' he said softly, 'Come and sit with me'

Vince made a mumbled excuse about having to get up early for rehearsal but Howard took his hand and made him sit down.

Howard sat there, just waiting.

'I can't say no' Vince said quietly, ducking his head.

'They need me', he continued leaning his weary head onto Howard's shoulder. 'And I want them to like me. Its not very fun though, Jonah screamed at me today for putting on weight, and Jasmine said I'm not photogenic enough for her, but it will be over soon, and friends help friends right?'

'What about you though?' Howard had whispered, stroking Vince's hair back off his face as Vince fell into a deep sleep. 'What about you Little Man?'

Howard carefully moved Vince's head, resting it against a cushion and putting the throw over him. Vince made a small noise of comfort and this made Howard's chest tighten with something surpassing affection, he walked over to Vince's phone, put it carefully down onto the floor. He re-fastened his shoelace.

Howard paused, looked up at Vince. He looked down.

_Crunch_.

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**Thanks! Please review! xx**


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